[He's quiet at that, wrestling with himself. It's difficult not to blame himself for everything that's happened- why shouldn't he? He has such immense power, but he never predicts anything well enough to put it to good use or to save anyone. His epipens for Gansey were stupid, the suit was ridiculous. If he could have predicted the Gray Man's arrival- a gun, maybe. If he could have predicted the attack on Aurora- a car and a friend to drive her far away from that place.
It's not that Ronan didn't do anything, it's that he's the only one who could have. In the wake of everything, prevention seems so simple, and his ill-thought countermeasures seem so childish.
But he doesn't want to sleep with a gun under his pillow. He doesn't want to always be looking over his shoulder. Maybe he has to. Maybe that's the only way he can protect everyone, but it would make him miserable. A fair trade, even he knows that, but- just the thought of it hurts a little. Maybe Adam would feel more protected that way, but Ronan doesn't ask.
Instead, he nestles closer and kisses the spot behind Adam's ear.]
We'll stay together. It's you and me- that's all that matters.
[Ronan's hand tightens on Adam's stomach, pressing closer to him, really letting himself feel the other boy's weight in his arms, letting Adam feel his comforting presence behind him.]
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It's not that Ronan didn't do anything, it's that he's the only one who could have. In the wake of everything, prevention seems so simple, and his ill-thought countermeasures seem so childish.
But he doesn't want to sleep with a gun under his pillow. He doesn't want to always be looking over his shoulder. Maybe he has to. Maybe that's the only way he can protect everyone, but it would make him miserable. A fair trade, even he knows that, but- just the thought of it hurts a little. Maybe Adam would feel more protected that way, but Ronan doesn't ask.
Instead, he nestles closer and kisses the spot behind Adam's ear.]
We'll stay together. It's you and me- that's all that matters.
[Ronan's hand tightens on Adam's stomach, pressing closer to him, really letting himself feel the other boy's weight in his arms, letting Adam feel his comforting presence behind him.]
Just this.